| | You know it's spring when:
Doors to coffeeshops are wide open and the clientele spills out obstrusively onto the sidewalk.
It's warm outside, and freezing inside the house.
You bump into some 'toddlers on church' jokes on someone's blog (in this case, Maria).
~
3-year-old Reese:
"Our Father, Who does art in heaven,*
Harold is His name.
Amen."
~
After the christening of his baby brother in church, Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked him three times what was wrong. Finally, the boy replied:
"That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys."
~
One particular four-year-old prayed, "And forgive us our trash baskets, as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."
~
A Sunday school teacher asked her children as they were on the way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"
One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
~
A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin 5, and Ryan 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson.
"If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'
Kevin turned to his younger brother and said:
"Ryan, you be Jesus!"
~
A father was at the beach with his children when the four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore where a seagull lay dead in the sand.
"Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked.
"He died and went to Heaven," the Dad replied.
The boy thought a moment and then said:
"Did God throw him back down?"
~
A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned to their six-year-old daughter and said,
"Would you like to say the blessing?"
"I wouldn't know what to say," the girl replied.
"Just say what you hear Mommy say," the wife answered.
The daughter bowed her head and said:
"Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"
~
I don't know if these were all authentically or fictionally composed, but here are some real-life funnies with some local Pittsburgh moms:
MAYA: [very seriously] Mommy, I think I know what I'm going to give up for Lent.
SERINA: [surprised] What's that, honey?
MAYA: Salt. I'm going to give up salt.
SERINA: Wow. I know how much you love salt. Sounds like you thought about that for awhile.
MAYA: Yes, I did. But this means I can't have eggs, because I can't eat eggs without salt.
SERINA: Well, suppose you tried eggs with just pepper and herbs? It would still taste yummy.
MAYA: [thinks and thinks and thinks]
MAYA: Yeah. Lots of pepper, though. But not cayenne. Just black.
SERINA: [nods solemnly]
And,
Jonathan: "I know why Isaac died."
Heather [thinking she'd like to know]: "You do? "
Jonathan: "It's because his body stopped working." Directly after the above: Jonathan: "If Jesus didn't die on the cross..."
Mommy thinks: we'd still be dead in our sins...we wouldn't be reconciled to God...
Jonathan: "...then he could die on the ground." <melts>
|
| | Posted 3/26/2007 12:32 AM - 49 Views - 4 eProps - 2 comments
- recommend
  - recs0
- share
- email
 - sent0
|
